Fred’s 2-Cents Worth for the New Year (AKA How not to be put on restriction in 2010)

 Fred New Years Headshot

1. I’ll remember that the garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.

2. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house.

3. I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to throw up.

4. I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing.

5. I will not chew my human’s toothbrush and not tell them.

6. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging.

7. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it’s raining outside.

8. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.

9. I will not steal my Mom’s underwear and dance all over the back yard with it.

10. I will not bite the officer’s hand when he reaches in for Dad’s driver’s license and car registration.

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>